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Sunday's are for rest and relaxation, are they not? In my case, rest and reflection is more of what happens. I try and rest my body but my mind is in full gear with the "would have's, should have's and what will I do in the future"

Since Eric's death, I have noticed that I, me as a person, has changed quite dramatically in some cases. I continue to have guilt over the events of that day. "If I hadn't requested the return of an item that day, would he still be alive? Would he still be here if I had gone to pick the item up for pain control?" I don't think guilt will ever go away, even in time. As a Grandmother, should I have have known better, done more? I think so and these are a few questions that run around in my head sometimes on a daily basis.

Now on Sunday's, I reflect on the short time I had Eric in my life. I remember the joy I felt to be able to be snuggled by him and how much he was just like his Dad at that same age. I try to reflect and remember all the GOOD things and times we shared and not to relish on the things I could not control over the last almost 11 months now.

I try and think of ways to honour the short time he was here. This website/blog is one of those things. I have other things in mind that I will reveal in the months to come.

Once again, I truly appreciate you popping in and I hope that I can resonate with other Grandma's out there.

Remember to #saytheirname ! They will always have a place in our hearts and should always be spoken about.

Grandma Tammy

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